My daughter is leaving for her first year of college. As the time get closer and closer I couldn’t believe the overwhelming sadness. Really? I mean, thousands of mothers go through this every fall and somehow survive, why is this taking me by surprise? As I was walking two days before she was to leave, I came upon a house that I frequently pass by. Every morning when I drive or walk by this particular house, I see this young mom outside with her two little girls. Her hair is a little messy, dressed in sweats/pj’s with a cup of coffee in her hand and a smile on her face. You can tell she just loves being with her little ones. Whenever I see those girls out riding their bikes or playing outside, mom is never far away. It so reminds me of when my kids were little. Her house is even the exact same kind of split-level we lived in! When my kids little and we were outside, I was ALWAYS with them. I may have been too protective, but they were never out of my sight. And I loved playing with them! We did everything together, wash the car, gardening, baseball, baby pool.
So yesterday, when I was struggling with the grief of Nicki going away to college I decided to walk and really ask God “how am I supposed to navigate through this difficult transition? I mean, this is way harder than I thought it would be.” Well, there I see the young mom and I’ve always wanted to stop and talk to her, and today seemed like the day. I walked up and told her I always noticed her out with her kids. I said “My oldest daughter is leaving for college in two days….” And with that I burst into tears! She was very understanding. I quickly recovered and started to tell her the joy I get from seeing her with her kids because it instantly takes me back 16 years ago. I told her what she is doing, the time she is spending with her girls is one of the most important things she can do with her life. I encouraged her that when it’s so hard staying at home with your kids because it can be mind numbing or tedious, don’t ever doubt you are making the biggest contributing to our future society! Even though you don’t get a raise, a promotion or award, the REward she will receive when her girls are older is immeasurable. She agreed and said there’s nothing else she would rather do. I could tell that she got it. So I quickly went on my way, and that's when it hit me. It’s the circle of life! I felt like God was showing me how life goes on. It has to! I HAVE to let my girl go. I can’t afford the luxury of being sad because she is leaving. It’s her time. It’s her journey now. She has to go and start her life, apart from me (not too far apart :) It’s her turn to learn from life; experience the tough things that make you grow and the joys that are richer than you ever thought possible. And who knows, maybe some day she will have the amazing honor of seeing her daughter go off to college. Maybe she too, will raise a daughter smarter, stronger and lovelier than her. Just like I did.
“Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.” – Dr. Seuss
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